Here’s another ethical issue and Jewish source response:

Case

On [the tv show] ER, a seventeen-year-old cystic fibrosis patient, a boy, is near the end of his life.  He wants to die in peace. He wants to have a DNR order placed. There is no question that he will die soon.  He wants to die peacefully. His mother (and his sister) can’t live with his decision. So when the doctor allows him to die peacefully, according to his wishes, they order him to restart his heart and insert a breathing tube.  By American law, the child is still a minor, and the doctor has to follow the mother’s wishes.

Answer

[a] Under Jewish law, a dying person can ask for a DNR (The death of Rabbi Judah, Ketubot 104a).

[b] Also, under Jewish law, the commandment “Honor your father and mother” applies at any age, so the question of whether a seventeen-year-old is an adult doesn’t matter.

In the Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh De’ah 241.25 says that you can disobey your mother over choices of schooling and marriage (major life issues).  When to die probably falls under this category. 

[c] Also, the Rashi commentary to Leviticus 19:2 makes it clear that you need not follow your parents’ wishes when they violate the Torah.  Based on the Seven Laws of Noah (Sanhedrin 56a) causing an animal to suffer tzar ba’alei hayyim (causing pain to animals) is a biblical prohibition.

The mother’s wishes here are probably wrong and need not be followed.

Joel Grishaver, “You Be the Judge”, pgs. 118-119

Used with permission from Joel Grishaver