Here’s another ethical issue and Jewish source response:
Case
Danny is eight. His best friend, Robbie, is also eight. They do everything together. Their fathers used to be best friends, too. The problem started when Danny’s father borrowed a lawn mower from Robbie’s father. The next time Robbie’s father went to use the lawn mower for his lawn it was broken. He blamed Danny’s dad. Danny’s dad said, “It worked fine when I returned it.” The lawn mower was the start of a big fight. Things got worse and worse. It made it harder and harder for Danny and Robbie to hang out together. Then one day Danny’s father said to him, “I don’t want you playing with Robbie anymore – and I want you to listen to me, because I am your father.” Danny asked his rabbi the following question: “I know that the Torah says ‘Honor your father and mother,’ but do I have to honor him when he’s being stupid?”
Answer
Can Robbie’s and Danny’s fathers stop them from being best friends?
[a] One of the 613 mitzvot is Leviticus 19:17: “Do not hate your brother/sister in your heart.”
Some commentators explain that brother/sister means another Jew; others say that it means any other person. Therefore, Danny’s father’s attitude and behavior are against the Torah.
[b] Rabbi Asher Ben Yechiel, who was known as the Rosh, lived in Toledo, Spain, in the early 1300s actually had to solve a case like this. He started with Rashi’s comment on Leviticus 19:2. The verse says: (1) “Every person must “fear” his/her mother and father, (2) and all of you shall keep my Shabbatot, (3) I am the Eternal, Your God.”
RASHI: “Why are all three parts of the verse packed into one sentence? To teach this lesson. That (1) you must ‘obey’ your parents unless they tell you (2) that you must violate the Shabbat or break any other Torah commandment, because (3) I am the Eternal, and I am God to them and God to you. Parental authority is absolute unless they tell you to go against the Torah. God is the final word.”
[c] The Rosh said, “By giving such an order the father was acting in an unJewish manner. This being so, the son need not obey him.”
Joel Grishaver, “You Be the Judge”, pgs. 27-28
Used with permission from Joel Grishaver
